I'm a doctor, not a...
From Memory Alpha, the free Star Trek reference.
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I'm a doctor, not a... is a famous catch phrase used in Star Trek. Originally used by Dr. Leonard McCoy in Star Trek: The Original Series, the phrase lived on in various other incarnations of Star Trek and was used by both Julian Bashir and The Doctor, among others. Dr. McCoy's original delivery of the phrase varied with emotional intensity, from extreme frustration to light-hearted sarcasm. Subsequent uses in later series also mirrored this performance. This iconic phrase has also appeared in other media as both a parody and homage to the show.
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[edit] Usage
[edit] Dr. Leonard McCoy
- "What am I, a doctor or a moon-shuttle conductor?" (TOS: "The Corbomite Maneuver")
- "My dear girl, I'm a doctor. When I peek, it is in the line of duty." (TOS: "Shore Leave")
- "I don't know, Jim. This is a big ship. I'm just a country doctor." (TOS: "The Alternative Factor")
- "Me, I'm a doctor. If I were an officer of the line..." (TOS: "A Taste of Armageddon")
- "What do you mean what sort of work? I'm a doctor." (TOS: "This Side of Paradise")
- "I'm a doctor, not a bricklayer." (TOS: "The Devil in the Dark")
- ...to which Kirk replies, "You're a healer, there's a patient. That's an order."
- "I'm a surgeon, not a psychiatrist." (TOS: "The City on the Edge of Forever")
- This is an interesting statement since, in the episode "Court Martial", Doctor McCoy is called as an expert witness in space psychiatry.
- "I'm not a scientist or a physicist, Mr. Spock..." (TOS: "Metamorphosis")
- "Look, I'm a doctor, not an escalator." (TOS: "Friday's Child")
- "I'm a doctor, not a mechanic." (TOS: "The Doomsday Machine")
- "I'm a doctor, not an engineer." (TOS: "Mirror, Mirror")
- ...to which Montgomery Scott immediately replied, "Now, you're an engineer."
- "I'm not a magician, Spock, just an old country doctor." (TOS: "The Deadly Years")
- "I will not peddle flesh! I'm a physician." (TOS: "Return to Tomorrow")
- "I'm a doctor, not a coal miner." (TOS: "The Empath")
- "I'm not a mechanic, Spock..." (TOS: "The Empath")
- During one episode of Rowan & Martin's Laugh-In, DeForest Kelley spoke the line "I'm not a doctor, I'm a convicted murderer."
[edit] Dr. Julian Bashir
- "Garak, I'm a doctor, not..." meaning a spy or an investigator, but Garak interrupted him (DS9: "Past Prologue")
- "I'm a doctor, not a botanist." (DS9: "The Wire")
- "I'm a doctor, not an historian." (DS9: "Trials and Tribble-ations")
[edit] The Doctor
- "I'm a doctor, Mr. Neelix, not an interior decorator." (VOY: "Phage")
- "I'm a doctor, not a voyeur." (VOY: "Parturition")
- "I shouldn't have to remind you: I'm a doctor..."
- "I'm a doctor, not a performer." (VOY: "Investigations")
- "I'm a doctor, not a counter-insurgent." (VOY: "Basics, Part II")
- "I'm a doctor, not a bartender." (VOY: "Twisted")
- "I'm a doctor, not a database." (VOY: "Future's End, Part II")
- "I'm a doctor, not a peeping Tom." (VOY: "Drone")
- "I'm a doctor, not a battery." (VOY: "Gravity")
- "I'm a doctor, not a dragon-slayer." (VOY: "Bliss")
- "I'm a doctor, not a zoo-keeper." (VOY: "Life Line")
- "I'm a doctor, not an engineer." (VOY: "Flesh and Blood")
- According to the official Robert Picardo website during Picardo's audition, the final scripted line for the reading was, "I believe someone has failed to terminate my program", and he finished his audition with the ad libbed "I'm a doctor, not a nightlight."
[edit] Dr. Phlox
- "I'm a physician, not an engineer." (ENT: "Doctor's Orders")
[edit] Starfleet EMHs
- USS Enterprise-E EMH Mark I: "I'm a doctor, not a doorstop." (Star Trek: First Contact)
- USS Prometheus EMH Mark II: "I'm a doctor, not a commando." (VOY: "Message in a Bottle")
[edit] Variants
[edit] The Original Series
- James T. Kirk
- "I'm a soldier, not a diplomat." (TOS: "Errand of Mercy")
- "You keep saying that. Are you a doctor, or aren't you?" (TOS: "Amok Time")
- "These are people, not robots." (TOS: "The Apple")
- Karl Jaeger
- "I'm a scientist, not a military man." (TOS: "The Squire of Gothos")
[edit] Deep Space Nine
- Gaila
- "I'm a weapons dealer, not a soldier." (DS9: "The Magnificent Ferengi")
- Cardassian Security Officer
- "This is a jail, not a hotel." (DS9: "Sacrifice of Angels")
- Crewman Kellin
- "I'm sorry captain, but I'm an engineer, not a magician." (DS9: "The Siege of AR-558")
- Martok
- "Why? You're a bartender, not a warrior." (DS9: "Shadows and Symbols")
- Miles O'Brien
- "I'm an engineer, not a philosopher." (DS9: "It's Only a Paper Moon")
- Odo
- "I'm a security officer, not a combat pilot." (DS9: "Vortex")
- Benjamin Sisko
- "He's not a detective, he's an engineer." (DS9: "Prodigal Daughter", about Miles O'Brien)
- Douglas Pabst
- "I'm a magazine editor, not a crusader." (DS9: "Far Beyond the Stars")
- Julius Eaton
- "Calm down dear boy. We're writers, not Vikings." (DS9: "Far Beyond the Stars")
- Worf
- "I am a warrior, not a murderer." (DS9: "Broken Link")
[edit] Voyager
- The Doctor
- "This is a sickbay, not a conference room." (VOY: "Caretaker")
- "They're Klingons, not kittens." (VOY: "The Killing Game, Part II")
- "This is sickbay, not an arsenal." (VOY: "Bliss")
- "She's a counselor, lieutenant, not an engineer." referring to Deanna Troi (VOY: "Life Line")
- "This is a sickbay, not a dormitory." (VOY: "Demon")
- "This is a Federation starship, not the Barge of the Dead!" (VOY: "Repentance")
- "I'm a doctor, not a zookeeper." (VOY: "Life Line")
- "I'm a doctor, not an engineer." (VOY: "Flesh and Blood")
- Diagnostic Hologram
- "I'm a diagnostic tool, not an engineer." (VOY: "The Swarm")
- (said of The Doctor): "It wasn't programmed to be a tenor, it was programmed to be a physician." (VOY: "The Swarm")
- Tom Paris
- "I'm a pilot, Harry, not a doctor!" (VOY: "Message in a Bottle")
- B'Elanna Torres
- "I'm an engineer, not a costume designer." (VOY: "Virtuoso")
- Neelix
- (Quoting Captain Janeway, refering to her as "the warden") "This is punishment, not shoreleave." (VOY: "Thirty Days")
- Kathryn Janeway
- "This is a starship, not a nature preserve." (VOY: "Someone to Watch Over Me")
- Nechani Magistrate
- "I'm an official of the government, not a spiritual leader." (VOY: "Sacred Ground")
[edit] Apocrypha
- Quark
- "You're a doctor, not a gambler". (The Big Game)
- Kira
- "I thought you were a doctor, not a hacker." (Proud Helios 260)
- Miles O'Brien
- "Dr. Bashir, you're a doctor, not a first-contact specialist." (Valhalla 19)
- McCoy
- "You're a doctor, not a Horta." (The Return 268) talking to Bashir.
- EMH
- "I'm a doctor, not a computer." (Avenger 350)
- EMH as McCoy
- "I'm a doctor, not an interior designer." (Avenger 351)
- McCoy
- "I'm a doctor, not a sideshow." (Avenger 354)
- EMH
- "I'm a doctor, not an archaeologist." (Wildfire 118)
- EMH
- "I'm a doctor, not a concierge." (A Time to Sow 135)
- EMH
- "I'm a doctor, NOT a Space Marine!" (Star Trek: Voyager: Elite Force)
- EMH Mark II
- "I'm a doctor, not a quantum mechanic!" (Spectre 212)
- Brex
- "Damn it Jim, I'm an engineer, not a conversationalist!" (Star Trek: Bridge Commander)
[edit] Prior Art
While the character of Dr. McCoy inarguably made the phrase "I'm a doctor ..." part of the common lexicon, he was not the first fictional doctor, or even the first character on the big screen, to coin the phrase. In the 1933 American film The Kennel Murder Case, Dr. Doremus, the coroner at the scene of the titular crime, states "I'm a doctor, not a magician," and "I'm a doctor, not a detective," within five minutes of his first appearance. It is unclear whether these particular dialog artifacts were progenitors of McCoy's famous phrase.
